I am getting asked a lot now about when we are going to have another baby.Â I also get asked (but a lot less often) about how many kids we are going to have.
Now, I have to confess something.Â You know those people who have dozens and dozens of kids?Â I kind of understand where they are coming from.Â I really like kids.Â I cannot imagine not loving my twelfth child as much as I love my first child.Â Plus, our current record is that our children are really quite awesome, so I think it would be a kind thing to the world to make sure there are lots of them.
However, there are also lots of reasons why I will not end up with twelve children.
- Spacing- I don’t know if anyone has noticed, but Elizabeth is two now and I am not pregnant.Â It is my personal preference for a pretty substantial gap between children.Â I understand why some people don’t feel that way and prefer their kids closer, but for myself, I like some space between kids.Â If I continued our current spacing plan, I’d be really quite old before I made it to dozens of kids.Â (I’d be in my eighties before they all moved out of the house.)
- Logistics- The amount and timing of children we have isn’t actually up to us.Â We can’t just go pick one up at the store when we feel ready.Â I mean, we can try and not try to have kids, but we don’t always get what we want either way.
- Practicality- I want my family to be able to travel in one car.Â I want us to be able to go on vacation and rent that one car without having to arrange for a fifteen passenger van.Â (Also, I used to drive a fifteen passenger van for field trips.Â Those things are enormous and hard to drive.)Â This is just an example, of course.Â I also like to eat out; I want to be able to take my family out to dinner without having to save up for a month.Â You know, things like this that would be much harder with more children than I can count on my fingers.
- Money- Matt and I are in the reasonably comfortable financial situation that we are because of several things that our parents did for both of us.Â We realize how lucky we are and we’d like to provide those same advantages for our children.
- Matt-Â Matt doesn’t want dozens of children.Â I really think that his opinion should matter in this decision, at least a little.
- Sleep-I like to sleep, okay?
I mean, I know that there are obviously ways around most of these things and that if I REALLY wanted forty-five kids, I could buy a bus and stop eating out (and buying things like food and heat and clothes) and yes, we COULD do it if we wanted to do it.
When we started talking about kids, we agreed to consider them on a plus one basis, so I don’t know how many we will actually end up having.Â It’s not like we decided years ago that we’d like one, or two, or three.Â So, we’ll see.
How about you?Â How many kids would you like?Â And just for fun, how many do you think I should have?