Dear Disney

Dear Disney/Pixar,

Do you know how much influence you have over our children?

Actually, with something like $30 billion in sales of licensed merchandise, I suspect that you actually do know how much influence you have over our children.

So help us parents out, Disney.  You’ve already done a wonderful job getting my daughter to allow me to brush her hair.  Sure, I have to pretend that her hair is glowing and sing “flower gleam and glow” while I do it, but she really likes Rapunzel.

I’ve gotten her to get wet in the tub all the way by having her swim like Mr. Ray.  She doesn’t throw toys because she really doesn’t like it when the preschoolers are too rough with Jessie.

But we could use a lot more assistance from the people our kids really listen to.  How about having Sleeping Beauty announce that you really should get your pajamas on already and get into bed without crying?  Lightning McQueen could discuss the importance of buckling yourself safely into your car seat instead of trying to grab your mama’s sunglasses off the top of her head.  Linguini and Collette should really insist that small children sit down in their chairs and eat those vegetables on their plates.

Maybe Woody and Buzz could discuss how it is really important to share with your friends instead of whacking them over the head with a wooden hammer.  How about Bruce mentioning that it is important to open your mouth so you can have your teeth brushed?  And this one is really important, someone needs to talk about how it is much nicer to use the potty instead of wearing diapers.  (A fairy would be great, thanks, preferably Tinkerbell or Vidia.)

I mean, really, Disney, we send quite a lot of our hard earned money your way.  You could at least have Mickey Mouse teach our kids to wash behind their ears.


Elizabeth’s Mama